How to deal with rejection as a wedding photographer.

wedding photography training

Rejection is a big scary word. It's something that makes us feel uncomfortable. It's also something we fear and that fear stops us from taking action. 

This is why if you are in business you have to learn to face it and deal with it. Otherwise, you will never grow, never see the success you want. 

There are many situations in wedding photography that you will have to face rejection. It's the only thing that is guaranteed. 

Rejection from potential clients.... we have all faced that, the radio silence after consultation, the sorry we have gone with someone cheaper. We also have potential rejection from our industry, our peers, friends and families. 

There is enough rejection out there to keep us safely behind our computers with nothing but the odd social media post to keep us hoping we may get bookings. 

There is enough rejection out there to keep us thinking small

Fear of rejection can be crippling. It will stop you following up, contacting other suppliers, doing that emotive and personal blog or maybe going live on your page. 

However, let me tell you a story about a recent rejection of mine. One of my goals for 2018 is to really focus on my PR and get more of my work out into the blogs and wedding publications. To do this you obviously have to submit your work and this plays on all kinds of fears. What if they say no? What if they tell me my work is awful and I have no business being a wedding photographer? It's enough to stop some of us in our tracks. I submitted anyway, I love my work, my clients love my work.... I was feeling confident. 

I had 3 rejections for my wedding at Hedsor House. 

A good few hours researching blogs and preparing a submission and I was rejected 3 times over a week. I was deflated and bordering tears. This was almost enough to make me abandon my entire PR strategy for the year. 

One more I thought, I will try one more. And I decided to go big or go home. I submitted to Love My Dress the fussiest of them all. And guess what? It was accepted!!! 

Since then I have also had two more weddings accepted to other blogs for the year. In January alone I had hit my PR goals for the whole first half of the year. Huge confidence boost and the realisation I was still thinking small.

Imagine if I had let the uncomfortable feeling of being rejected get in the way of that? 

So here is what I do now when it comes to doing something that means putting myself out there.  

Instead of thinking of all the worst things that could happen. Instead of worrying about what people will think of me. Instead of thinking about being told no......

I choose instead to approach the situation with curiosity. I ask myself; I wonder what will happen? I wonder what could happen? I wonder what new opportunities this uncomfortable action could create? 

The thing is though and this is the scary bit, in business you are going to face that rejection not once, not twice but potentially every day. And as well as having a positive approach to it you need to have a resilience for it. That means facing it at every opportunity and not being emotionally attached to the outcome. 

This Ted Talk by Jia Jiang really does go deep on how rejection is an important part of your growth https://www.ted.com/talks/jia_jiang_what_i_learned_from_100_days_of_rejection 

Now you don't have to do Jia's method of learning to accept it BUT you should be thinking about starting to do one a thing a week that puts yourself out there, something that will help you stretch your capacity for rejection. Then over time, you will find yourself emotionally unchanged when that client says no or that blog rejects you. Over time you will find that one rejection doesn't stop you from continuing to put yourself out there. 

So what are you going to do this week that yep will make you uncomfortable but could also open new doors? 

Be bold enough to use your voice, brave enough to listen to your heart and strong enough to live the life you have always imagined

If you wish to get involved with me more I have two ways you can do that. You can join my facebook group Women in Wedding Photography or get in touch to have mentoring with me. I have 6 spots available between now and the end of March. 

Have a great weekend!
Ami xx

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